Friday, October 7, 2011

Dodgy's got a brain parasite

The problem with hollowing, or hallowing as some call it, is that it's like putting up plaster over an ants' nest and hoping they won't tunnel through. It works along the same principles of reincarnation, but you don't get a brand spanking new body.

You also are at the mercy of whoever's hollowed you. I can hollow, but I'm not so good at making a new person. The seeds of a new personality must be planted and helped to grow. Hmmm, maybe a better analogy would be a garden plot that's had the black spot and you tote in new soil to plant your tomatoes, but the fungus is still down there, waiting for the roots to find it.

Anyway, I've come to the conclusion that someone hollowed Dodgy a long, long time ago. So he's had a long time to reinforce his current personality with memories. But whoever did it, and I'm thinking it was the Assassin since there's no reason to think anyone else would do something like this, he did something I've never seen before.

Hollowing is kind of a misnomer. The memories never go away, they're just covered up and replaced. A real master of this kind of thing can actually use real memories to reinforce the new personality. It's like breaking a plate and using the pieces to make a mosaic... it's not a plate any more; it's something new. But pieces of the plate are still there and the mosaic wouldn't be the same without them.

So Dodgy got hollowed and slapped with a new (obnoxious) personality. Then the Assassin took an extra step and put this thought eating thing in his head so that if Dodgy thinks too hard about the missing pieces in his mosaic, this "jellyfish fog monster" will eat his concerns. And the more he presses, the more riled it gets until it's not just removing his confusion; it starts taking out thoughts and then the memories that inspired those thoughts. It's got "stingers" all through his mind that I hadn't noticed before. If he thinks too hard in a direction it doesn't like, it adjusts him. No wonder I wasn't getting anywhere with my tortures.

I don't know what do about this thing. It's like his mind is booby trapped. I press too hard, it'll turn his brain to mush. I wonder if the Assassin did this just in case he was ever captured, Maybe Dodgy has secrets we could use against his master.

I'm going to have to talk to Mercury about this. He might have some ideas.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Done and Done and still more work to do

I finished with Liger's hands this morning, which meant he no longer had any reason to be in the basement with us. I wasn't told to make him suffer past the skinning; so I healed him... and gave him the skin. I'm not sure what he's meant to do with it, but that at least I was told to do. He stalked past Dodgy's cage, giving him a warning glare, and of course Dodgy couldn't stay quiet, even with no tongue. He chortled, maybe trying to provoke Liger. It worked.

Liger stopped and turned back, moving so quickly I only had time to shout, "No!"

But he didn't do anything. He went up to Dodgy without touching him at all and said something his ear. Then he left without sparing a glance for any of us.

And Dodgy looked kind of confused and looked at me funny. He's been staring at me ever since, and it's getting annoying.

I have no idea what Liger would have said to confound Dodgy so much, but he's been very docile all morning. Of course, I cut all the tendons in his arms and legs the other day so he hasn't got much fight left in him at all. I thought about it and whittling him away like I did with Lisa might not please Father. I can fix his tendons later. Father would probably want him with a bit of fight left in him. It's a lot of work, but doable. Taking his arms and legs off completely wouldn't have left much to work with.

His mind is a muddle of confused memories, and I get a headache every time I go in and try to make sense of any of it. How can he have a thousand year's worth of memories in his head and then just this big blank wall of nothing. I don't think he's even aware that parts of his mind have been... removed. I think whatever Liger said, he jarred something loose though. Dodgy's thoughts are all itchy now, like he's trying to remember something and that wall of nothing is trying to eat his turmoil. Like it's alive and aware, and its purpose is keeping Dodgy complacent. I've never seen anything like it. It makes me sick anytime I brush up against it.

Bleh... I'll be glad when he's gone. I heard Father beat the shit out of Dodgy's master. So maybe that's why he hasn't come to collect the small fry yet.

In other news, Seraphina's becoming more and more withdrawn, but Heri's out of his cage. :) Heri's keeping the name, and it suits him. His life in Egypt is easily his strongest, though he's remembered bits and pieces of other lives now, mashed them together to see the common threads, people he's known... He claims he had a portion of the Mother's soul in his care until she was murdered... a student of his when he was quite old and teaching young scribes their trade. There have always been rumors about bits of her soul surviving, even after what Merodach did, but usually by the time we get to investigate, she or he's been murdered by the Assassin.

Father will want to hear about Heri's memories.

Monday, October 3, 2011


Liger is in a cage, and he sits there and waits patiently for his punishment to continue, staring death at Dodgy whenever he would open his mouth. Up until a few minutes ago, Dodgy took great delight in calling me Ty, and I could see Liger clenching his fists, hear his knuckles popping despite the cuts whenever he did. I think Dodgy did it just because he KNEW it bothered Liger (and me).

If Dodgy dies, he's free to find another body. He knows it, Liger knows it, but Liger doesn't care. Whatever harm Dodgy did him whenever and a day ago, Liger hasn't forgotten.

This is horrible.

I'm... half tempted to have Delphi and Jet work on Liger, but I know they wouldn't do it right. They'd cut too deep, and I'm not trying to filet him.

I'm to take the skin off his hands, all in one piece if I can. Flensing hands is delicate work. That's the punishment Mercury was sent from whoever decides these things when Father is busy.

At least he's not going to be hollowed or killed... Apparently Father's too busy to come even for Dodgy, let alone Liger. And Liger is... has always been so very loyal.

I started and had to stop. I told Jet to gag Dodgy. He was mocking Liger and egging me on. I stopped again; there was "something" in my eye. Liger just sat there, silent and motionless, waiting for me to continue. He didn't even flinch under my blade or have to be restrained, just watched me calmly like... he expected I wouldn't hurt him or what I was doing didn't hurt at all. And I know damn well it does. Inquisitor was fond of hands.

When I stopped again, Liger said, "Shhhhhh" very softly under his breath, and "Go on..."

Dodgy was giggling. I told Delphi and Jet to cut out his tongue... and cauterize it so he couldn't try to drown on the blood. Of course they didn't strap his head down properly, and he tried to impale his head on the hot iron when they brought it near his mouth. Stupid noob mistake... but it was my fault. They're not experienced. They couldn't have known to expect a move like that. I had to leave off my work. Jet and Delphi kept his head still while I strapped it down and forced the bit back in his mouth and then wedge it open even more to get the iron in. Thankfully he passed out when I finally managed to burn the stub of his tongue. He doesn't need to be able to speak for me to pick his brain.

We were all covered in blood. I sent Jet and Delphi up to shower and bring me some clean clothes. I can't go anywhere. I'm stuck down here with the prisoners. I can't even clean myself until they get back, and I'm leaving red smears on my keyboard. There's a sink in the workroom. I'll pop back as soon as Delphi and Jet come back... whenever that is.

I'm sleeping in Liger's cage tonight, even if he's been creeping on me for four years. He's the only one who's never let me down and maybe he had a good reason for trying to strangle Dodgy.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

making conversation

I wish Blogger had a private posting function. So far I haven't gotten into any trouble for having this blog, but... sometimes I'm not sure if I'm doing the right things, like if I'm making the right choices. I wish I could just make this post visible to my friends only and they could give me feedback without me worrying someone else might see. It's hard being in charge of breaking people and having no one to tell me if I'm doing it right or majorly screwing up.

Dodgy kept up a running dialogue all night... Even telling me at one point that he liked my humming. (I didn't know I *was* humming!) As I was finishing up with my... whittling? sketching? Whatever it might be called, Dodgy asked if he could see my work.

That stymied me, since there was no way to do it without untying him, but there were mirrors in the workroom (since letting people see the damage is sometimes worse than the actual torture). So I wheeled him in there and set up some mirrors to reflect the images until he could see them. He gushed over them and said it was too bad he'd be leaving the body, and my sketches, behind at some point.

I must have scowled because then he wanted to know what was wrong, and I blurted out about how only Igigi and darklings are sick cannibal parasites who steal other people's bodies and eat them up from the inside out. Then he asked uncomfortable questions about Father and people who are Hollowed, laughing when I said that Father only eats bad people. And Hollowed just have their memories wiped and a new personality implanted so they can start over and have a chance to do better.

He asked my name and kept asking till I said, "Ty." That amused him because apparently it wasn't as descriptive or in his words as "flowery" as he'd expected. He told me I deserved a prettier name. >:| Then he asked how old I was and pretended shock when I said 18. "Aren't you too old to believe these fairytales?" he asked.

I punched him in the kidneys and put away the mirrors, wheeling him back out to his cage where I ignored him until dawn and Jet and Delphi came down with some breakfast for me. Then we wheeled him back to the workroom to start the day's session. Jet noticed the pictures I'd drawn up to Dodgy's knees first. Both of them were pretty impressed and couldn't understand why I was so grumpy. So I'm sorry for that if you guys ever find my blog. Dodgy didn't say a word the entire session, which was unusual, but maybe he was tired from being up all night.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

In the dungeon

He just stares at me. Dodgy, that is. I mean, when I'm torturing him or about to, he's all jokes and flirting, but when I'm sitting here on the cold cement floor, typing away... he just stares at me. It's annoying. Does he want to blog? Well, he can't because all his fingers are broken. Ha!

I feel bad for Heri and Seraphina. I can't spend as much time with them because I can't leave Dodgy. Someone might come and kill him while I'm working down the hall; so I have to work on each one where the others can see. That's not fair to them. Our sessions should be private... like doctor patient privileges.

At least most of what I'm doing with Heri now is in his head, so less potential embarrassment for him. Seraphina is confused by our stillness though. She begs me to stop when I torture her, telling me she'll be good. She's got the wrong idea, either from trying to escape and being punished or watching me and Heri. Dodgy watches too, and I resent him for it. He doesn't belong here. He's not one of us.

Except, I don't know... I really want to explain everything to him. I want to plead our case, make him understand that his "master" is a MONSTER. It's wrong but... Dodgy makes me feel shy and self-conscious. Maybe it's all that over the top flirting. If he was actually in a male body right now, I'd be tempted to geld him (thank-you Wolfie for putting the thought into my head heh). He told me he liked my mask earlier, and I just about dropped my scalpel. That's not professional.

Why can't he just scream and beg like a normal person?

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Cat's out of the bag

Sorry for the radio silence... been very busy and, well, I haven't much time to post even now, but I figured I could update you with at least this little bit.

Liger is in a lot of trouble.

He came down to the cellar while I was resting and tried to kill Dodgy.

Dodgy is hardly any worse for it, but Liger refuses to talk, even to me. I don't know why he did it, except he must know Dodgy from another life. That's no excuse though. Someone as "high profile" as Dodgy, only Father should be permitted to end his life.

The fact that Liger found out Dodgy was here while he was out and came home directly to kill him means that news of his capture has officially made the rounds. No one is coming to take him to a better Interrogator than me because anyone could try to kill him now, in transit or upon arrival... all the people who he's hurt, who've lost loved ones because of him or his master... Apparently everyone's decided keeping here is just the most expedient thing.

Now I have to sleep in the cellar, in the cage next to him, just to make sure no one uses the Path to skate in and off him while no one's watching.

Until Father comes for him (soon I hope!), I'm a glorified babysitter! :(

I hope he's not too angry with Liger.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011


So they brought me a trolley. You know, one of those tall hand carts like you'd strap a fridge into. And we tied Dodgy into it with crisscrossing ropes (so he can't get any leverage). He's down to his underwear and bra, which for some reason made me blush though I'm not gay and I've seen men and women both more nekkid than that. Glad my mask hid my blushing, or I'm sure he would have harassed me about it.

Man, does he like to talk, but I think some of it's nerves. (Did not appreciate the comments about my hair :P ) I haven't spoken to him at all. Not one syllable. I've told everyone else to be entirely silent around him too, which is fine. Given Delphi's burgeoning (lol big word! Thank you spellcheck) talents, all we have to do is think, and she can relay dropped thoughts. Jet's got the weakest mental voice, so she mostly relays my thoughts to him and vice versa.

We're still hand feeding Dodgy, but now that he's recovered some, I don't have to be sharing my energy with him too, and I can sleep! Like any of Father's children, I can go days without sleeping, but it helps if I'm not also on a 36-hour healing kick. Had Delphi feeding him at first, but then Jet stepped in when Dodgy made her cry with comments about her scars and blank mask. She hasn't been with us long enough to see them as a badge of honor. Now she's in our room, drawing pictures of masks until she decides on a design she likes.

Guess if we won't talk to him, he's going to pick at us. When Jet took over feeding him, he started digging at him about his mask, which is completely black. I think it's meant to be a play on his name, but I've never asked him.

Heri, as I've been calling the revived Egyptian priest, and Seraphina have both been watching from their cages as we take care of the new prisoner. I guess there's not much entertainment for them otherwise. Heri has taken to calling me Sekhmet-netjeri. I think he's pretty close to a second breakthrough, but we'll see. Least he's not calling me a demon or an evil magician any more.

I told Seraphina if she tries to get away again, she's going to be strapped to a handcart too. She hasn't in a while though. I broke her first two fingers days ago. She can still use utensils to feed herself with her thumb and remaining fingers. I just figured Dodgy was probably more practiced, so I broke all his fingers. Hopefully he can't use his toes or something.

Torture sessions start tomorrow on what is technically day three, since Candle brought Dodgy to us Sunday night. I doubt I'll get anything out of him, but it's not like I'm asking any questions. The torture is just a distraction so I can get into his head. Hopefully he won't notice, at least not at first. I don't care if he notices later since once I'm in, there's not much he'll be able to do to keep me out. Though obviously the longer I can rummage around without him noticing, the better.

Monday, September 26, 2011


Thank you so much for your efforts, brother! If you'd said what a fuss Dodgy put up when you caught him, er her, I would have healed you before you left. Well, feel free to come back with Kobold if you like, and I will heal you both of your injuries and take that boy off your hands if need be.

Dodgy is... I've told no one, but I feel... We must have known each other once. I don't know under what circumstances, but I don't feel any instinctive dislike for him. I feel the same as I do for any Anunnaki or sympathetic Igigi or innocent human -pity. Though obviously Dodgy is an enemy, and I have to treat him as such.

S/he was in really bad shape when Candle dropped him off. I hardly needed Jet's help to get him into a cage, though we did break all the bones in his hands so he couldn't pick the locks or anything once we untied him. Still, s/he's almost starved to death. Gotta nurse him... her back to health before we can begin any physical work.

Look, this gender thing is confusing. Just understand when I say him, he's currently in a woman's body, or well a girl. I don't think she was older than fifteen or sixteen.... and he ate her soul. That's sick. That's what Igigi do, not Anunnaki. So black mark against him so far as I'm concerned. >:[

Though there's this niggling little current of pity whenever I look at him.

And he's so obnoxious! o__O I've been feeding him broth and my own energy to help him recover from his near death by starvation. I mean, some of the siblings have suggested I should make him crawl across the floor and slurp from the bowl like a dog, but he's not even strong enough for that, so they can STFU. Still, if he keeps flirting with me, he's going to have to learn to feed himself with his feet because I will heal his fingers all wrong.

Friday, September 23, 2011


I've gotten news that... I'm to expect a very dangerous and unusual "guest." I'm excited and terrified at the same time. I am merely the nearest to his captor's location, but I'm honored that I get first crack at him. At least until he is put in the care of other, more experienced interrogators.

Mercury has told me all this in confidence. No one else will know who he is aside from that he is very dangerous and will be under guard at all time. And because he's well aware of how over protective Liger is, my big unbrotherly shadow is to be sent away on a new mission.

I probably won't get anywhere with the prisoner, but it's nice to be given the chance!

Monday, September 19, 2011

So busy!

Sorry I haven't posted the last few days, but I've had a lot of work to do. I had three Chosen at once, and no one to help me. At least when we'd get so many before, there were two of us to handle the workload. I do sort of have help, but neither Jet nor Delphi have much (any) experience. Delphi, you'd know her as Melissa... she's made such progress! Her mental voice is a bit clumsy and unpredictable, but she'll be a great interrogator some day.

She's completely healed now. Her and Jet have fallen in together like old friends, else I probably wouldn't have included him in our sessions. Who knows but that Jet and Delphi won't end up as hunters instead of interrogators. With her mental abilities, she'll have no trouble identifying Chosen, and Jet's a teleporter and very good at snatch and grab. I'm still working with her to uncover memories of other lives. She has impressions of many wars... the civil war, I think Vietnam, and so many others.

Well, her ultimate job is for Father to decide when he comes back to check on Delphi's progress. There's no telling when that will be, but she has to face his approval eventually and be given his blessing. What that is, is hard to describe, but not everyone walks away from it. We die a little and are reborn, part of our soul taken by Father, mixed with his own energy, and returned to us. A "reaffirmation of our familial ties" as Mercury calls it.

One of the three Chosen, ugh, he turned out to be Igigi, a bad one. I had to hollow him, and unfortunately I'm not very good at filling up the space left behind. So I hollowed him and gave him a few compulsions and normal urges (you know... eat food, go to the bathroom, obey anyone in a mask) before some of my siblings transported him elsewhere. Someone else will decide who he should be and what purpose he will serve. Hollowing always makes me feel... sluggish. Like I just ate a big meal.

Of the other two Chosen, one snapped by the second day and started babbling in ancient Egyptian. That was interesting. That life must have been very close to the surface. He was a Heri-sesheta in that life, a "priest of the secrets" aka a wizard. (hahaha He threatened me when his other life emerged, thinking I was a demon sent by his enemies to torment his sleep.) His talents will be invaluable to the family; magic is just a round about way for humans to manipulate energy. It's something the Anunnaki once did as easily as breathing, but so much of our power was stripped from us when we were imprisoned.

The third, she might end up hollowed too. She's definitely Anunnaki but so stubborn. If she is hollowed, I'll be very disappointed in myself because she's very resourceful. She's escaped three times, and she's only been with us five days. I mean, that's a useful skill. You can't teach that kind of resourcefulness, least not in the space of a few months, which is all the time I'm usually allowed. She hurt someone the last time though, and that can't be allowed. I'm afraid if she gets out again, my siblings just be too irritable to capture her a fourth time.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Early morning visitation

Liger's home... and a little put out by our guest. I can't tell how he feels about my "promotion." I don't think he cares much that Inquisitor is gone, but having Melissa in our apartment is making him irritable. Oh well, I'm not putting her back downstairs. She's not trying to remove her mask, and mostly she's just sleeping while her body heals. Besides, having her there means if he planned to approach me about his *feelings,* she's cramping his style.

Good. I've decided I'm a little angry with him over the whole thing. Pedo much, big brother? I mean, he's never done anything inappropriate, but he pretty much took me out of the cage so he could make a pass at me four years later? No, that's creepy. I don't care if he knew me in another life. I don't have those feelings for him. He should have given me over to Whistler and kept his distance. Then I wouldn't feel like he's been watching and waiting and creeping on me all this time. Eeeew

Liger came on the heels of Father, who paid us a visit early this morning. News of Inquisitor's poor career choice traveled fast, I guess. Father wasn't exactly gentle in getting everyone's understanding of events. Lots of headaches... I've been offering to fix them, but only about half of my siblings have taken me up on it. They're so stubborn. What more do I have to do to convince them that I'm loyal? Father could have killed me if he held me accountable for Inquisitor at all, or taken me to another Interrogator to be broken properly, as I should have been when I first arrived. He did neither. He left everyone in the roles Mercury had given out and left. To find Inquisitor or assign someone else the task, I don't know. But if Father doesn't have a problem with me, why should any one else?

Melissa was in bad shape after Father's visit. She's new enough that his presence is still... very stressful, and having to relive the darkling attack only made things worse. I had to slip in and turn off her fine motor skills as he reviewed the attack so she wouldn't start clawing at herself and reopen her wounds. I think that surprised him. :3 I think he was pleased. o///O

Jet's been hanging around too, which I think is making Liger jealous. I think Jet just wants to be my apprentice even though he's a hunter now. (He chose the name Jet because he's a fast runner.) Liger has stared him down on the few occasions he's come by. I think I'll talk to Mercury about it. Maybe he can send Liger back out where he can work off some of this nervous energy before he hurts someone.

Monday, September 12, 2011

He... ran?

In a million, billion years, I never would have expected Inquisitor to run. He never struck me as sentimental. Either Mr Creepy had his hooks in his brain all along, or Inquisitor was up to more than just feeding us to his former brother.

Inquisitor was the leader of our little group. He relayed orders to us from his own superiors, sent people on missions, and generally just kept us operating smoothly. A real micromanager.

After our little confrontation, I wasn't too surprised when I didn't see him early yesterday, but I wasn't exactly going out of my way to look for him. In fact, I hadn't planned on leaving the apartment at all, except...

Jet came knocking at my door around noon, giggling like a maniac. When he finally calmed down, he said, "Inquisitor did a runnner."

For a few seconds, I thought he meant that Inquisitor killed one and was baffled by his amusement. I mean, it happens. Inquisitor's not the sort to do it in a particularly amusing way, not like some who see death as the ultimate joke and go out of their way to make it ironic.

But then he explained how one of Inquisitor's toadies (Cassia) worked up the courage to knock on his door to get her daily to-do list at sunup. Usually he's already slipped it under her door by the time the sun rises, but he hadn't that morning. Inquisitor didn't answer, but the door popped open. He must not have closed it right when he left. She was curious I guess and poked her head in since he never let anyone in his apartments. There was no sign of him, but the place was trashed like he had a tantrum (which I can believe.) I guess she was a little alarmed because she went in and looked around. There was no sign of him, just the mess.

Well, since no one is ever allowed into his rooms, Cassia had no way of knowing if that's how they normally were. So she went downstairs and saw the darkling was gone too. The real clincher though was when she went down to his workshop and all his tools were gone.

So she went haring up the stairs to tell everyone Inquisitor had gone rogue. Inquisitor's former lackeys all got together to figure out who should be in charge in his absence, and from there, things fell apart pretty quickly because they ALL wanted to be in charge. At which point, everyone but a few of the less politically minded Anunnaki knew Inquisitor was gone. So Jet came looking for me, since he figured I didn't know and wanted to share a good joke.

If Jet expected me to laugh, he was REALLY disappointed, because whatever anyone else might think, Inquisitor running off is not good. It makes us all look bad because he was in charge of us, and the in-fighting among his former suck-ups made us look even worse. So the sooner we got ourselves back onto track, the better. Well, I'd planned on talking to Mercury about Melissa anyway. It seemed like the best time to go look for him.

Mercury is.... difficult. He's old and irritable at the best of times, looking a bit like Franklin Douglas but with piercing eyes so pale brown they're practically orange. His mask has black smears on either side of the mouth that make it look as if he's always scowling, and the smears under his eyes and across the forehead only enhance that. He doesn't speak, least not with his mouth. We didn't always communicate with sound, he says, so he refuses to use our "slave language." Considering he WAS a slave prior to the Civil War, he's got more reason to be outraged than most.

He's got a really strong mental voice, which is why I had planned to talk to him about Melissa. She's going to need him to teach her how to speak so others will hear her. Least that's why her sister and her were brought in, telepathy; so she had that in her favor.

I figured no one told Mercury what was going on either, since everyone tends to avoid him because they're not comfortable with his voice in their heads. Which means they resist hearing him so he has to shout. Meh, I can see where he's coming from, and it's not like Father makes noises like an animal either. So I went looking for him, hoping Inquisitor hadn't sent him away on a mission like Liger. If Liger had been home, all the squabbling would have been over in a second. He would have smacked some heads together, assigned someone to be in charge, and that would have been the end of it.

Turns out I didn't have to tell him what was going on, and I should have realized he would just know. Unless it's shielded, he hears every stray thought within a couple blocks of the building. His gut reaction was to let the "children" fight, but he conceded my point about how it would make us look if Father came or he had to send someone to restore order. So he shouted for everyone to "shut the hell up" and told them he was in charge until further notice. Then he assigned everyone duties, more or less what they had been before Inquisitor bailed on us except he told Inquisitor's old lackeys to clean up his apartment. Then he told everyone I was the new Interrogator, second to him in terms of leadership, and that was that.

I am not comfortable with this change. I don't feel qualified, and there's lots of siblings who are going to resent me because I'm not an elder and haven't remembered any of my past lives. I hope when Mercury gets in touch with his superiors, they send someone better qualified than me.

Saturday, September 10, 2011


I spoke, and Inquisitor listened. I never spoke to him like that before, in anger... in command. I told him I was keeping Melissa with me in no uncertain terms. I made Jet give testimony as to how she was when he helped me carry her to my room.

And I told him to get rid of the darkling, or I would call Father and tell him of the two Chosen it killed and the third Initiate we almost lost because of Inquisitor's pride.

When I was done, he turned and walked away without a word. Maybe if almost everyone hadn't been gathered in the hall, morbidly curious or as witnesses, he might have attacked me or taken the girl. But I knew I was right and he knew it, and even if something happens to me, all of our siblings knew it too. Word will reach Father about what happened here. Rumors spread.

Inquisitor will be punished for his pride, even if I do not speak against him. Hopefully he will do something about his former brother and his punishment will be reduced. Inquisitor has his faults, but he has done good work as well.

Father will hear...

I am so mad... soso furious.

Inquisitor needs to get rid of that darkling NOW. That thing needs to die. I- I'll tell father if he doesn't.

Melissa is hurt. She may never speak again. I'm keeping her in our apartment. She is NOT going back to her cage.

Mr Creepy doesn't seem to want to escape, since he had every opportunity to do so when he got Melissa to let him out. Instead, he made her get a piece of broken metal from somewhere and cut open her own throat, completely destroying her larynx. Her clothes were neatly folded and placed a few feet away, spotless.

When he was sure she couldn't scream, he made her mutilate herself. She was very nearly dead when I came down with her breakfast, and he.... He was standing over her, hands on his knees, grinning as he watched her gut herself.

When he heard the tray drop, he sauntered back to his cage and pulled it shut behind him. He cackled as I rushed to where Melissa lay and threw himself into his chair to watch as I tried to keep her alive. The damage was extensive, not like when we torture. His intent had been to cause as much damage as possible in addition to pain.

I felt him then, psychically leaning over us, feeding on her pain and terror, my frustration and fury. No wonder Inquisitor never had me bring any food for his "pet." The thing is an energy vampire. It feeds on emotion with a preference for the negative. Anytime we had a torture session, he was probably glutting himself. Lisa had probably been an all you can eat buffet for him. Even my rage as I dragged Melissa to the door and pulled her into the stairwell was a treat for him.

I called for help, and Jet helped me carry her up after I swore I'd take any punishment Inquisitor decided to dish out. Well, I don't care. I'm right, and he's wrong, and Father will not be happy about him keeping a darkling and letting it feed on his children.

I've only just managed to stabilize Melissa, but there's not much left of her larynx. And the edges of the wound are seared. He burned her, like he did the others, but kept her alive to dine at his leisure. Maybe he developed a taste for her over the last few weeks. I don't think I'll be able to reconstruct her voice box. Her other injuries require more attention and by the time I get to it... It may already have begun to heal.

I'm just resting and... and purging some of this rage by writing this. I don't want to feed that Thing anything else. I have no idea how far it can reach, but if some of the more recent petty quarrels are any indication, it's been feeding on all of...

Pounding on the door. I think Inquisitor is back. I'll be back later.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011


Melissa gave up her name today. She wears a blank mask now. We'll keep her in the cage for a while longer, until she's used to wearing it. Inquisitor still has to punish her once in a while for taking it off, but mostly he's been making inroads into her mind, turning over her memories like rocks to see if any memories scurry to older places.

I'm not allowed to go into her mind alone... I'm not skilled enough. I might erase something important or not see clue to what she was. So I stand and watch and learn from Inquisitor.

It's very boring.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Do unto others

It wasn't easy. There was a whole list of questions we had to ask the twins, about themselves and each other. We had to play them off one another, ferret out secret jealousies and resentments, offer to harm one or reward the other. Even then, we had to find out which twin had that certain sense of entitlement... that arrogance that is particular to the Igigi.

Turns out our twins were born conjoined. That means the Igigi twin tried to EAT the Anunnaki twin in the womb. That's what they do, you know? They hate us that much. They're worse than the darklings. They want to eat us and spit us back out and turn us into slaves.

We put the girls in separate cages facing each other across the hall. We could have just killed the Igigi twin or hollowed her and given her to our new sister as a servant, but Inquisitor had a better idea since they'd been conjoined. He said we could use that to break our Anunnaki sister of her sham-life and wake her up.

We put a blanket over Lisa's cage, hiding her from Melissa's view. We took Melissa out of her cage for her "sessions," but never let her see Lisa. And Lisa never spoke to her after we put her away behind the curtain; we made sure of that first thing. So far as Melissa knew, her sister was not being tortured and might not even have been in the cage any more.

We took very good care of Melissa though. She ate better than any other Chosen, ever. I made her homemade soup and steak and roast... In two weeks, she actually gained weight, despite being tortured every day. I healed her of the worst of it, but people usually lose weight in the cages, not gain it. It's psychological. By the time we were ready to reunited the sisters, Melissa was well on her way to having this life stripped away. It helped that she was convinced that Lisa was dead and that we were only trying to fool her by keeping the blanket up.

Melissa was violently sick when we finally took down the blanket. I can't blame her. Cannibalism is darn gross. You can get all kinds of diseases from it too. There wasn't much left of Lisa, but she was still alive. Inquisitor took Melissa out of her cage, put a gun in her hand, and told her to kill Lisa.

Oh, you could see the hate in Lisa's eyes, and she only looked at Melissa, not myself or Inquisitor. Melissa might have been dragging her feet in the memory department, but it looked like Lisa knew who her enemy was. There wasn't much left of her face. We'd had to cut her larynx so she wouldn't call to Melissa and remove her teeth and lips so she couldn't make any other sounds. Most people would have died a long time ago from all the flesh she'd lost, but Inquisitor had me healing her with every cut we made so she lived even when she was little more than a torso. Inquisitor put the barrel against Lisa's head, and helped Melissa pull the trigger.

I'm glad Lisa's gone. Feeding her and healing her were too big chores I'm glad I don't have to do any more. She was so light, I carried her body upstairs all by myself. There's enough of her left to make soup for Melissa, not that she's really aware of what's going on any more. I think she was pretty much gone as soon as the gun fired. No it's time to rebuild her from the ground up... see if we can drag any memories out of her of who she used to be.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Business as Usual

Liger's gone away again on some mission or another. I'll miss him as I always do, but I'm kind of relieved too. He hasn't said anything about his *feelings* since he carried me out of the basement, but it's not a conversation I'm looking forward to, you know? I don't want to hurt him, but I just don't feel that way.

Without Liger here, I'm back to working with Inquisitor. Because Liger is kind of my keeper, and someone needs to watch me when he's not here. That sounds so stupid, like I'm five. Can't they tell I'm loyal by now? :( I wouldn't ever betray the Family or Father. I want to make my contribution just like everyone else!

We have new Chosen downstairs, which is good. I've been hearing people talking about Inquisitor and his "guest." Apparently I'm not the only one the darkling's been messing with. Lots of people complaining of dreams, though not like the "hallucination" I had of Whistler. I miss her more than ever now. Did he eat her? I'll never see her again if he did. She's gone forever. I could hate Inquisitor for that. At least if there are more Chosen downstairs, it will keep everyone occupied as they speculate on who they were or who they'll end up being.

It's hard to describe Inquisitor since Liger whispered in his ear. I don't know what he said, but Inquisitor has been very business-like since I went back to working with him. He doesn't say anything more than he has to... like "pliers" or  "tweezers" or "Drano" or "ants." He hasn't had any reason to punish me since Liger went off to do whatever it is he does when he's not with me, but it's really only a matter of time. I'm clumsy and sometimes slow to find what Inquisitor demands. Eventually that gets on his last nerve, and I have to be punished. I don't hold it against him. I just have to be better.

We have a pair of twins in the cages now, as far away from the darkling as possible. Twins are tricky business. Sometimes they're both Anunnaki or one is and the other is human, but sometimes one is Igigi because they fell in battle together or something. Then we have to torture both of them until the truth comes out. It's weird to have twins with us right now considering Inquisitor and the darkling are twins, unless the darkling was just throwing up a glamour to mess with my head more.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Booooooooooooooooored and creeeeeeeeeeeeeeped out

I cut all my hair off. Half of it was burned away, and I can't make hair grow any faster than normal. So I cut it off. It's just hair, and this is just flesh, and both are just part of a mask that my soul wears.

I don't know what I'm posting about really. I feel... blah. Liger has been nurse-maiding me like crazy, and I haven't been allowed to leave the apartment or go anywhere without him. And I love him, but not that way. It so weird to know he does love me that way. I don't want it. I feel awkward and weird. I'm glad I have this outlet, else we'd have to talk about it or something. Father doesn't bar his children from having relationships, but there's no guarantee that their children would be born Anunnaki. There's all kinds of conditions that control how a soul is reborn and with what souls it grows and I really don't know how it works. And this is a tangent. I just don't want to deal with knowing Liger likes me. Who does he think I was in whatever life we shared? Because I don't feel that way about him. I'll never feel that way about him. I don't want a boyfriend dammit. I want a big brother.

Especially now that... now that Whistler is dead, and I'll never see her again, except in my head if that darkling messes with me again. And I am so angry because I think Inquisitor got her killed catching his brother, the darkling host, and he didn't have any right! Even if he could get the darkling out of his brother's body, his brother is GONE. It's just a body! It's -it's a waste of time and resources. Father would NOT approve. The darkling's killed two chosen while we've kept him here.

I should be sleeping, but this is about the only time I can post without Liger looming in the background. He doesn't show any interest in computers, but that doesn't mean he might not read over my shoulder.

I'm just gah!!!!!!! Arrrrrrrrrg! I hate being cooped up. Now I don't even have any work to do because Liger doesn't trust Inquisitor not to hurt me. Heck I don't even trust him. But I feel like I'm being smothered. I need to do stuff.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

In my head

So, um... Inquisitor came back. I woke up with him standing over me, and he definitely wasn't happy. He dragged me out of bed by my hair and wanted to know what I was doing in the basement. I guess the Creeper was telling tales just like I figured he would. Bastard.

"No one knew where you were. I was worried!" I shouted, curling up into a ball as he kicked me. First rule of enduring a beating, preserve your squishy bits.

"You were worried about me?" He sneered at me, like it was the stupidest thing he ever heard. Yeah... I'd have to agree with him there. Won't catch me looking for trouble twice. "Up."

Inquisitor grabbed me by my hair again (I should really keep it short), and I had no choice but to get up or have it ripped out. He didn't let go and proceeded to drag me down to the basement. A few people came out of their apartments to stare, and that only made him angrier. "Find something to do, or I will be back for you when I am done with her."

They didn't need to be told twice.

Creeper was back in his chair when we passed, and it looked like Inquisitor had been busy replacing the lights. If anything, it was brighter down there, each bulb giving off tons of light and heat. They looked like outdoor spotlights rather than regular bulbs. I guess that's where he's been, collecting the bulbs and new sockets and maybe even borrowing the technical knowledge of how to replace the old lights. Inquisitor may not be able to keep a person alive if his tortures go too far, but he's hella-good at getting into people's heads. That's why he has the job he does.

The basement was hot and humid like a swamp. Only the light directly over Creeper was out. He looked absolutely pissed about it. Not even my predicament lightened the scowl on his face. Though I guess after the things Inquisitor said, Creeper was probably more upset about my predicament than I was.

Inquisitor threw me into the chair and tied down my hands and feet so I couldn't struggle, not that I would. I'm not that stupid.

"You went out last night without permission," he said, his back to me as he examined his tools.

"I was with Whistler..."

"Liar! Whistler is dead. A darkling ate her a year ago."

I don't remember exactly what I babbled at that point, but Inquisitor slapped me hard enough to make my ears ring. "But I did see her..."

"You little idiot. You let him get into your head. He could have made you do anything. A few more days, and he would have had you unlocking his cage and helping him slaughter us all." I started to cry, and he slapped me again. "You're weak. Everything about you is weak. You should never have been allowed out of your cage."

And then he started to torture me... really torture me, like he was trying to break me like when I was first brought into the Family. I really tried not to scream. I hate when they scream. I didn't want to be weak like he said. I tried to be strong and not scream. It was Whistler who got to me. I could see her standing in the corner, watching Inquisitor hurt me and I started to cry again, and then Inquisitor got angry and put away the knives. And brought out the acid.

My screaming brought Liger down... sometime later. I don't remember. I don't remember anything after Inquisitor dripped acid on my face. I'm sure I must have kept healing myself; otherwise I'd probably be dead. At least Whistler was gone when I looked around. A darkling ate her. A darkling... probably Creeper. Why else pick her to mimic? But then I could just as easily have filled in the blanks myself, recreating my friend who I missed. Inquisitor is right. I am very stupid and useless.

Liger... hit Inquisitor... just once. He knocked him into the table and knocked a lot of his tools on the floor. He leaned down as Inquisitor scrambled to pick them up, and Inquisitor froze where he crouched. Then Liger unstrapped me and carried me upstairs, past Creeper in his cage. He muttered the whole way up to our apartment, about Inquisitor being jealous and overstepping himself, about him being careless and putting us all in danger out of selfishness and that keeping the darkling prisoner was asking for trouble. And he said other things that I won't repeat because they were kind of embarrassing and... now I feel awkward.

I don't think he would have said any of it if he'd known I was awake.

Saturday, August 13, 2011


Whistler is so much fun. Don't get me wrong. I love Liger, but he's not someone who has "fun." He doesn't play. He teaches me things like how to throw a knife correctly, and where to hit someone if I can't get free of them, and how to make a shiv or take care of my weapons. Maybe he thinks that's fun. I guess it can be. I like learning new things, so yeah, it's... I don't know? Satisfying when I get it right, and he's happy with me?

That's not really "fun" though.

Whistler knows how to have fun. She took me out last night, and we stole fruit from an orchard. We snuck into a movie theater and saw Rise of the Planet of the Apes. She showed me how to mess with streetlights, which is actually a useful skill even if Liger calls everything Whistler shows me a "cheap parlor trick." We sparred a little, and she knocked me on my butt as usual, but she said I'm getting faster even if I don't get enough practice "dancing around a big lumbering ass like Liger." LOL Oh I wish they didn't hate each other so, but at least Whistler's insults are funny.

She got me ice cream, mind-whammying the guy behind the counter into thinking we'd paid when we hadn't.

I did ask Whistler about Darklings. Apparently there's more than one kind, but she didn't go into detail more than to say some of our allies are Darklings. I'm guessing the guy in the cage is NOT a friendly Darkling.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Liger, Whistler, and Me

I'm so glad Whistler is back with us! I missed her a lot. She's like... a hard as nails granny who dresses like a desperado complete with two antique mother-of-pearl-handled six shooters, and her mask is like a mashup of tragedy and comedy, split down the middle. People who see her must think she's on her way to star in a play. She can shoot a hole in a quarter tossed in the air; I have one that I keep in my pocket. She makes her own bullets, rolls her own cigarettes, and plays a mean harmonica. She's the coolest person I know. She used to sing and dance in an old West traveling show and met Annie Oakley once. :3

Whistler doesn't whistle though. She takes her name from her bullets slicing through the air (she says). Someone else told me she used to whistle though. The one she used to whistled tunes for died, and she hasn't found him again. :(

I get the feeling that Liger and Whistler don't really like each other sometimes, and I know she and Inquisitor don't like each other, though I don't think Inquisitor really likes anyone. Whistler was the one who first took care of me when I was newly Chosen. I had to go through the trials same as everyone else. She was the one who recognized my talents were full blown, even if I couldn't remember whoever I'd been. She taught me how to heal myself while I was still caged, among other things, and argued for my release so "my talents wouldn't be ruined." Then Liger happened to see me too and went right to Inquisitor to demand I be released into his custody.

To be honest, I was terrified of Liger at first. You know... after what happened when Father saved me. And having Whistler and Liger fight over me didn't help, but Liger's never ever done anything to make me think he might take advantage of me, and really he's like the big brother I never had. No one messes with Liger. So aside from keeping an eye on me to make sure I don't wander off, everyone mostly ignores me just to stay on his good side. Except for Inquisitor who says everyone must have a job, no exceptions.

Sometimes I wish Whistler and Liger hadn't gotten me out of the cage. I never get to do anything or go anywhere. Some Anunnaki don't trust me because Inquisitor didn't "finish" his work with me... as if I'd ever want to leave the Family. At least people here appreciate what I can do, and with everything I've learned about our history, I really don't think there's any other place I'd rather be. I like to think my tiny contribution will make our victory possible. There would be no ocean without all the drops of water that come together form it, right?

I'm glad Whistler's here. She's the one who usually teaches me new things and tells me about our past. If anyone knows about Darklings, it's her.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Whistler's back

I didn't want to go down in the storage area, but I hadn't seen Inquisitor in days, and no one said he had left. I was worried.

We haven't had any prisoners since that woman died. So I haven't had to go down to feed anyone or empty any buckets. (Well, do you expect them to just go in a corner?) Inquisitor told me to stay away from Creeper (that's what I've decided to call the guy), so I assumed he was feeding him... But then no one had seen Inquisitor since Sunday night, and he doesn't usually just leave without giving orders or putting someone in charge.

I hurried down the hall. More lights have gone out now. Creeper didn't make a move or a sound, but I felt his eyes on me as I passed. Inquisitor's workshop was empty though. I didn't dare turn on the light in case someone saw it peeking out from the cardboard taped over the windows, but there was no one there.

Then I had to go back up the dark hall, past Creeper again.

It was too much to hope that he'd leave me alone.

"Does he talk about me, little morsel?" he asked as soon as I left the room. When I didn't answer, he tried to be all comforting and sweet. He doesn't do it well. Just the sound of his voice made my skin crawl. "Tell me how my brother's been, eh? I have some sweets here, little morsel. Little girls like candies, yes?" He held up some kind of hard candy, the wrapper reflecting the dim light of the nearest lightbulb.

"I am not a little girl," I said and could have kicked myself. Should have just kept my stupid mouth shut, especially with how my voice shook. And I hadn't even passed him yet.

"Nooooooo, course not." He grinned or at least his mouth moved into something resembling a grin. He made the candy disappear down his sleeve like a magician, waving his fingers to show the candy had poofed. I wasn't fooled. I've seen such tricks before. Lots of elders have picked up sleight of hand and other tricks over the years and like to impress the noobs with them. "You don't know who I am at all, do you." He said it sullenly, a statement not a question.

"You're a darkling," I said, almost past him.

"You only know that because Kristoph called me thus," he snarled. Another of the lights went out, this one near the door to the stairs, and I looked away from him to the dead light. There were only three left.

I looked back at him and stumbled away. He'd moved to the door of his cage. I didn't even hear him get up. But that wasn't what made me stumble. It was Inquisitor in the cage. The darkling grinned at me, his teeth filmy with bluish black slime.

"We're twins," he said. "Can't you tell?" Another light went out with a ~*POP*~

I broke and ran for the door, and that's when it opened, and I ran right into someone.

"Oi, poppet. Is that anyway to greet an old friend?" The old woman asked in her vaguely British accent.

And it was Whistler, and I was so glad. She didn't scold me at all or ask questions, and I was too shaken up to ask her the million that crowded my head, like where she'd been for so long and why she was back. Whistler glanced down the dark hall where the darkling chuckled, but she let the door fall shut behind us and guided me back up the stairs without a word.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

A caged monster is still dangerous

Another prisoner dead. She was only in our custody for a few hours before she picked the lock of her cage and got out. And then she made the mistake of trying to free the creepy guy, or maybe he lured her somehow, asked her for help. I don't know. But she's dead. We found her crouched in front of his cage. She'd fallen forward in death, but the cage kept her balanced on her knees so she looked like she was praying. She was in worse condition than the kid.

I won't go into details.

I hope Inquisitor gets rid of this guy soon. That's two Chosen who won't be around to help Father when the time comes. That should be more important that whatever relationship Inquisitor had with this... this freak.

Guess who had to get rid of the body again though. :<  She was bigger than the kid. One of the guys helped me get her up to the bathtub I used for the kid, but he didn't stick around to help me... jerkface. Let's just say I've gone through a lot of professional strength liquid plumber lately.

Ughs, I want this guy to go away. He tries to talk to me now when I pass his cage. Just "Hi" and "Watchadoin'" like he's talking to a five year old. I can ignore that, but when he just chuckles at me, that's when the muscles of my neck bunch up. I know what the phrase "hair standing on end" means now.

Creepycreepycreepy go awaygoaway!

Tuesday, August 2, 2011


That kid is dead... I came down to feed him, and he was dead. He was sprawled on his side near the chainlink that separated him from creepy-guy, his eyes bulging and his tongue sticking out from his black lips. Suffocation, I'd guess, but how? Creepy-guy hadn't moved so far as I could see, but then I can't see much. The light nearest him is out, and I'm certainly not going to go into his cell to change it. And even if he had moved, how could he strangle the kid? The wire mesh is just tight enough that even if he could squeeze his hands through the holes, the kid would have had to sit there a let the guy choke him. I mean, if the creepy-guy bothered him as much as he bothers me, I can't see him doing anything like that.

I unlocked the cage to get a better look at the kid, trying to avoid looking at creepy-guy. I felt like he was staring at me the whole time and grinning, though he wasn't. I could at least see that much. The kid had burn marks on his throat, and I know he didn't before. Even if we had shocked or burned him in our efforts to make him cast off the memories of his current life, I would have healed him of wounds this severe.

I looked over at the creepy-guy and that's when Inquisitor decided to show up. :<

"What are you doing?" he barked at me, like I'd done something wrong. "Don't touch him." I wasn't really sure if he was talking about the kid or creepy-guy.

"He's... dead." It was kind of a lame statement. I mean, obviously the kid was dead. Any idiot could see that.

Inquisitor looked down at the kid with a shrug. I know whoever the kid was, he'll just be reborn into a new body somewhere down the line, but it's still pretty rude not to even care.

I looked over at creepy-guy again and Inquisitor grabbed me by the chin, digging his fingers in painfully. "Stay away from him," he hissed into my face before shoving me away.

I felt like saying... Dude, no problem, but it's impossible to really have a conversation with Inquisitor, even if you agree with him. The only thing he finds acceptable is silence and quick action. I backed away and edged around him to get out into the hall.

Then I heard the laugh.

It was a deep, gurgling chuckle. I immediately knew it wasn't Inquisitor, and not only because he doesn't laugh, ever.

"What's the matter brother?" said a voice that sounded like he was talking through blood. I looked back, but creepy-guy hadn't so much as twitched. "Is she precious to you?"

"You are no brother of mine," Inquisitor said in disgust as he reached down and grabbed the boy by the arm, dragging the body from the cell. He looked up and saw me still in the hall, and I saw his eyes narrow. uh oh "If you have nowhere to be, I will give you work," he snarled at me, dragging the body another foot before tossing down the arm he held. "Dispose of this and make sure no other prisoners are put in cells adjacent to the Darkling-spawn's."

So I guess there's more about the Darklings than what I'd heard, because I thought they were shapeshifters, not that they went around killing people through wire mesh.

Friday, July 29, 2011

New digs

We are in an apartment complex now... I don't know who lived here before we came, but everyone who is staying here now is part of the Family. I'm not sure if the owner of the building is one of us. Maybe, but probably not.

All the apartments are furnished. It's nice to have a bed, though I'm pretty sure it was a boy's room before it was mine. There was some... "stuff" under the mattress. 'Nuff said. I haven't touched anything aside from sleeping in the bed, though I'd love to take down some of the posters. Whenever we end up leaving this place, it's best not to leave a mark or have to waste time putting them back up again. :/

Oh, and we have air conditioning! And we can leave the curtains down, since it's summer and it's not suspicious at all. Who doesn't want to keep the heat out? And then we can leave our masks on because anyone who wants to come into the building has to be buzzed in or has a key so no one will see us. :3

Inquisitor has set up his "offices" in the basement. The storage area for each of the apartments is convenient for keeping prisoners, even though there's only two down there right now. I have been trying VERY hard to be obedient and careful, considering the epiphany I had at the campsite. I think he's noticed. It was very hard this morning... because we had to work on a twelve year old boy, but I did everything as I was instructed. At least Inquisitor has yelled at me less and hasn't had to punish me at all.

The other prisoner just sits at the back of his cage and doesn't move. He was there before Liger and I arrived. So maybe Inquisitor had time to work on him before I got there. I'd think he was dead since he's always in the same position, but I can see he has an aura of sorts, even if it looks like crap. So I know he's still alive. Inquisitor hasn't asked me to heal him either, so I don't know what's going on with him. Creepy guy though. I felt like he was watching me every time I passed by. Inquisitor would probably have laughed if he'd noticed, but he was busy putting away his tools. He's very tidy.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Why masks

I know lots of us have different reasons for wearing a mask. Some I've talked to wear a mask simply because they've been told they're supposed to, and someone once told me that we should wear masks so that we know each other when we meet. That's just stupid since ANYONE can pick up a mask and pretend to be one of us, and only a few of us would be able to tell the difference if it came to that. I mean, even the Assassin apparently wears a mask. So there's no sense in thinking a mask will let you know who to trust.

A lot of Anunnaki I've talked to wear masks as a sign of respect for Father because of what was done to him. You know... his face. So they wear masks to hide their own faces out of sympathy for Him. I don't know if Father really cares, but it's a nice thing to do anyway.

And then there's a few of us who know the truth about what was stolen from us, and we wear masks that show the form we would take if we could. There have been very few shapeshifters since medieval times. A lot of them got burned up with the witches the Inquisition managed to pin down. But I've heard rumors that there are a few werewolves and others who've managed to regain that power, and they don't wear masks because their human form IS their mask.

So jealous. :3

The Darklings can also shapeshift... but I've never met any, and what I do know about them gives me the creeps.

Friday, July 22, 2011


I've been kind of sad the past few days. First it was Sarah leaving, and obviously she had to go with her parents, but I liked having someone follow me around who wanted my attention. Then the thing with Naomi.

I'm not angry, but Naomi, if you're reading this, I really do believe you've made a mistake. Don't you know, deep down, where you belong? Father is always busy, busy, but he would have killed you by now if you weren't one of us. If we ever met, I would try my best to show you the truth, and I would do everything I could to make sure you weren't punished too severely for betraying us. It was just a mistake on your part. That's all. Considering how much of what we were is kept from us by what the Igigi did, it's not surprising so many Chosen rail against father and try to fight or run.

Come visit me anyway if you can Naomi. I won't be here much longer, but we could talk if you came. Secret-like. No one will know but you and me, and if you don't like what I have to say, you can go away again. I won't try to keep you, even if I want to. There's such comfort in knowing where you belong. I just want to make you understand. You would be happy. We could be sisters.

I know what really scares people, what turns them away from their instincts... the deaths, the murders. There's a reason for it, but I can't talk about it yet. :( Besides, Liger thinks I don't know what kind of work he does for father, but I've read the blogs. I'm grateful for how he takes care of me and protects me, but sometimes I think he tries to shelter me too much. Maybe that's why Inquisitor hates me. He's the only one who doesn't baby me even a little bit. Maybe he resents how sheltered I am. Maybe he's a better friend than I give him credit for and just wants me to live up to my potential.... not that I'm looking forward to working with him again. I hate watching people suffer and not being allowed to stop their pain until he says so.

We leave in less than a week. This time I won't say where we're going aside from further west and south.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011


I swiped some hotdogs from a BBQ some people were having. They never even saw me walk away. People are so blind... I feel sorry for them sometimes, but things will get better for them eventually. So I just have to be patient.

Sarah and I had a picnic inside a pine tree on the soft needles, a cave of bare and green branches around us, hiding us from view. When we saw her brother walking past, we threw pine cones at him, but he never saw us and ran away crying. Sarah had both hands over her mouth to smother her laughter. We went to find find some water to clean the sap off Sarah's clothes and found a beehive. The bees were easy to charm, and I got us both some honeycomb to chew on, which made Sarah stickier, but there was a stream nearby.

Unfortunately when we got to the stream, Sarah fell in and added mud to the sap and honey. There was no cleaning that off, so we went back to the campgrounds where her family was packing up to leave. :( I didn't know they were leaving today. Apparently her brother was looking for her when we beaned him with the pinecones.

I feel bad that I got her in trouble with her parents. Her mother wrestled her bag back out of their car and dragged Sarah into the cabin to wash her off.

But I guess it's better that she goes. She's not one of us and I don't want to see her get hurt because of me.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011


The campgrounds are nice. There are cabins and places for tents and RV hookups, which is where we are. Least we're in some "mountains," though they don't seem much like mountains to me after moving around in the Appalachia for so long. I'm glad at least for the trees. I'd heard Oklahoma was all grasslands.

There are some siblings here, but also some humans, which means I can't wear my mask. I feel naked without it. We could take care of them, one way or another, but this is a public place. So chances are, more humans would move in once it looked to the admin as if they'd gone. Just really not worth the effort when we'll be moving on in a few weeks.

I could hollow them. That doesn't really take a lot of skill. But they'd just be a bunch of drooling bodies, sitting around in the Oklahoma heat. I'm not practiced enough to be able to fill them up with something else, and I haven't got permission either. Just because Inquisitor isn't around doesn't mean I can't still get in trouble.

There are some other kids here. The eldest girl is a snob and only talks on her cell phone about how bored she is and how hot it is and how she misses whoever she's talking to soooooooooooooo much. It is to gag. :P I almost want to kill her cell phone battery so she SHUTS UP. But I am being good and not calling attention to us with any "unexplainable phenomena." Her brother likes to poke things with a stick and climb trees and thinks girls are "dumb." So he's pretty boring, too.

Their little sister is nice though. They don't have much use for her, being only ten to their eleven and fourteen. And their parents ignore all three and just sit and drink and fish or play poker with some of the other people in the cabins. They remind me of my parents, never noticing ANYTHING. Sarah, the little one, has been following me around the campgrounds since I'm the only one who pays her any attention. I've been showing her how to weave grass and what plants are good to eat and what animal prints go with which animals... nothing too weird.

I want to ask Liger if I can keep her. :3

But I'm pretty sure he'd say no :(

So I won't ask until right before we're ready to leave here. Otherwise he'd probably make me stop playing with her as soon as I asked, and I hardly ever have anyone close to my own age to play with.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

HiHi! :)

Sorry it has been a week since I last posted! We broke camp and moved three states away. We broke up into smaller groups too, and me and Liger and a few others are in RVs now and not making do with tents and lean tos (and I do LOVE being able to take a shower once in a while). We move around a lot, just to be safe. And Inquisitor isn't with our group! :D  Not right now anyway. We meet back up with him in a month somewhere out west. D:

I heard some people talking though. Apparently the Assassin has appeared after decades of silence. He commented on his Acolyte's (SP?) blog, only I'm not stupid enough to link to the post (since it seems the Acolyte recently discovered the novelty of trackbacks, a-der!). I did follow him anonymously though, and the Assassin's blog too, though there's nothing on it. The Acolyte's name is Dodgy, which is a stupid name. I mean like I have room to talk, but anyway. How can anyone willingly follow the Assassin? He serves the gods who bound us and crippled us and stole the power that was rightfully ours! I can hardly wait the year and a half until we get our chance to put the Igigi in their place and take back this plane for our own. I want to be a real cat then, with claws and teeth and no one will ever hurt me again. Not unless they want to get their face ripped off.  =^*^=

Liger was mad when he found out I knew about the Acolyte. He wanted to know who told me. Apparently it was a secret? He was still angry when I told him I'd just overheard some siblings talking, but it's not like anyone specifically said, hey Ty, we're moving because some body-stealing idiot named Dodgy might be sent to wipe us out. Side note... having read his most recent post, I think Dodgy might be Hispanic this time around. Just guessing on the Speedy Gonzales references.

I had to promise Liger that if it ever happens that the Acolyte comes around, or the Assassin for that matter, I'm to run. I AM learning to fight whenever anyone has the time to show me anything, but Liger says I'm too valuable for my skills to get myself killed trying to fight someone like this dimwit Dodgy or his master. Well... I don't feel valuable, whatever Liger says. Most of the time I feel useless. Most of the time, everyone else thinks I'm useless too, I think, or at least they get annoyed when I ask questions or ask to be shown something. Most of the time I think I'm just important to Liger, and everyone is too scared of him not to humor him. Maybe Liger was my father in another life, so he's paranoid I might get hurt? I'd just be reborn like everyone else if I did die though, and sure it would take time for him to find me again, but it's not like I'd be erased forever.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Cookies and a Story

Liger's mask :) Isn't it pretty?
Liger's home! 

He brought me sparklers and Oreos! I shared the cookies with anyone who said they'd like some. Inquisitor did not want any, and I didn't expect that he would, but it would have been rude not to ask. He just stared at me like I was an idiot. As if to say, you know I hate you, why would you offer me cookies? Well, I don't care. He's mean, and I'm not. If he doesn't want any cookies, the more for me and everyone else. I'm not going to be mean just because he is. Then he'd win.

I put the sparklers away. Maybe when Inquisitor goes away the next time, I'll bring them out and play and share with anyone else who wants to play. There's no sense aggravating him by being "a silly little girl without the sense to keep quiet and out of sight unless she's wanted" as I heard one of Inquisitor's "friends" say to his buddy. Inquisitor doesn't have any friends. He just has people who kiss his ass in order to get favors and I won't. I refuse.

X, I asked Liger if it was okay to write about the Igigi, the Anunnaki, and humans. He said I couldn't tell the whole story yet. :( He says it's not time yet, and the Assassin might step up his game if he realized how much we knew, but I can say what the difference is at least!

In the beginning, there were the Igigi who had no bodies and were from a place where only spirits lived. One day the weakest of the Igigi discovered Earth and being curious, got stuck in the material world like quicksand and couldn't be taken back out again. So some powerful elder Igigi came to earth because they decided the little ones needed to be cared for since they couldn't be freed. 

Before they came to Earth, the Igigi created children by "budding." (I'm guessing like cellular fission or like micro-organisms.) But when the guardian Igigi came and created bodies for themselves, they paired up and gave birth to the Anunnaki, the gods of the earth, and Father was the first! 

Everything has an Igigi soul, even rocks, but these are usually of the weakest kind of Igigi, and they barely know that they are even a rock. The Igigi try to keep any more spirits from coming to Earth, except if they are exiled for whatever reason, which Liger says still happens sometimes. So that means that souls are constantly reborn, though they mostly forget their previous lives. So when I mention humans, they're technically Igigi (or even Anunnaki) but they probably don't know it unless they were around when Father was born or they're our enemies like the Assassin.

My mask... not as pretty :(

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Knowing My Place

Liger has been gone for days and days, and I miss him terribly. Maybe that is selfish of me, as I know we all have our work to do and also because I miss him because I am more afraid when he is away. Inquisitor hates me because he was forced to give up breaking me by others who were concerned my gifts might be ruined if I was driven mad rather than remembering. Some things I can do, only Father can do, so I am very valuable to the cause of the Anunnaki. While I serve our people Father may spend his important time on other matters.

I would hide and wait for Liger to come back, but if Inquisitor needed me for his work, and I was nowhere to be found, I would be punished even worse than I already have been. With me there, Inquisitor is able to go further in his tortures than he ever would be able to on his own. He is horrible, and I hate him, though I know I shouldn't. But he is a monster, even if he is Family. He enjoys his work too much.

I am nearly healed from my punishments. The day after Liger left, I was punished with lashings for not being quick enough when Inquisitor summoned me, and again when I tripped and made him accidentally cut himself instead of the Chosen he was trying to break. It wasn't my fault as the cables from the car battery were lying underfoot. He alternated holding my hands over a boiling pot and plunging them into ice water until they were red and blistered as bubble wrap. This I was finally allowed to heal later that night so that I could feed myself and so that whenever Liger returned, he wouldn't see.

Liger is Very old, centuries, and Inquisitor is not even one hundred. Liger could be a leader if he wanted, just based on his age and experience, but he doesn't want it. Still, there are very few as old as him and if he decided the Inquisitor had overstepped himself, things could go very bad for him. Which is why I was allowed to heal myself and why I've been forbidden to tell Liger what he did. I wish Liger liked computers but he calls my laptop a toy. He wouldn't understand the internet or blogs at all. I wish someone would tell him about Inquisitor, but I know none of you will because I have been barred from speaking about it and so therefore have you. Still... I wish...

There are good things about being Anunnaki though. Don't think I am complaining. Everyone complains once in a while, so that's normal, right? I do love the Family so very much.  My former parents never loved me or noticed me much... They weren't Anunnaki or Igigi, just human. They barely noticed when I disappeared. There were no pleas for my safe return, no newspaper articles about what they found of the bastard who tried to rape me behind the school when Father came and saved me. Father does not like people who do such things, not after what was done to HIS parents. What he did to that boy was horrible and I had nightmares for months, but he deserved it. I really thought Jeff was my friend but he was a liar. The only good he did was making me so scared my powers kind of kick-started and Father and many Anunnaki heard me screaming in their heads (as far away as Texas I was told). It's weird being grateful to someone for almost raping you, but I wouldn't be here with Liger and the rest of our Family otherwise. Even the things Inquisitor does when Liger is away are bearable if it means I am where I belong.

Monday, June 27, 2011


I hurt.

I shouldn’t be so sympathetic. That’s why the Inquisitor hates me.

Liger stands up to him any other time but not this time because I shouldn’t have been messing with the new guy’s ropes. He was tied up that tightly for a reason, and it doesn’t matter that his fingers were turning purple. It wasn’t anything that I couldn’t have healed later. Lots of the reborn Anunnaki have to live with the scars from before I came here. So I shouldn’t waste my efforts on temporary pains that will only encourage the Chosen to discard this life in favor of the previous. When I’m called to help with a new recruit, I’m to do only as the Inquisitor says, no more, no less.

Liger took care of my wounds, but he was none too gentle about it. I feel so rotten about disappointing him. I’m being punished. I was careless. So it’s my fault the new guy tried to kill me before he ran away. I have to learn obedience. I’ve been forbidden from healing myself since there’s nothing wrong with me that won’t heal on its own.

Liger told me a story while he was fixing me up, and I’m not quite sure what I’m supposed to get from it, but it’s more than he’s ever said all at once in the three years he’s been watching over me, so I figured I should try to copy it down.

Once upon a time (I added that part, but I tried to use his wording wherever I could remember it right), there was a young Prince whose entire family had been killed by the Assassin right down to his infant nephew in his cradle. The Prince left his land in the hands of his nobles, vowing never to return to his people, nor rest more than a night, nor take a wife, nor provide an heir to his throne until the Assassin was dead by his hand. So he hunted the first murderer high and low, through city and forest, across seas and continents, until at last he had cornered the masked killer.

But the Assassin was sneaky. He escaped into a private garden where he came upon two women and a child. As the Prince was nearly upon him, he snatched up the boy-child and held a knife to his throat, threatening to kill him if the Prince did not withdraw. The old nurse ran towards the palace calling for help while the Lady the Prince took to be the mother of the child stood by in horror. The Prince knew the Assassin would kill the boy regardless of what he did, but he could not bear the responsibility of being the cause of the boy’s death. They watched as the Assassin dragged his hostage to the wall of the garden, climbed a tree and dropped the boy after stabbing him once in the side.

Both the woman and the Prince ran to the wall, but the assassin was gone. The Lady gathered the child into her arms, but he was near death. Even if the Prince had carried him to the palace, he would not have lived to see a physician.

“Please, keep my secret,” the woman said to the Prince and bent low over the child even as men ran up to them with weapons drawn. In a moment, the child stirred and began crying.

Unable to follow his enemy without appearing guilty, the Prince laid down his arms and waited. As the men-at-arms arrived, the Lady called them away from the Prince, explaining that the man who had injured the child had already escaped. The Prince had tried to save them and should be treated with kindness.

Their looks remained dark until the boy agreed that the man had been chasing his attacker. The Prince would just as soon have continued his pursuit of the Assassin, but the King who was among the men, insisted on offering the Prince his hospitality. It became clear as they entered the palace that the woman was not well looked upon by the inhabitants. The boy’s mother appeared, rings dripping from every finger and gathered him to her, fussing over his wounds, now very much diminished. Her sister, for such was the Lady, stood away from the rest and was ignored.

A feast was held in the Prince’s honor, and he was in every way treated like a hero, though he had done nothing. He was plied with so much wine that he barely knew what he was saying. The company was enthralled by the story of his quest, which only reminded him that had he not been chasing the Assassin, the boy might never have been in danger at all. It became so shaming to him that he tried to deflect some of their attention to the aunt who sat at the very last seat at the table, silent and sad.

“How could she have helped?” the lord sneered, and the woman’s sister nodded.

Forgetting the woman’s plea, he said, “She healed him of his wounds.”

The party was plunged into silence. “Witch. I knew she was a witch!” was shouted by several feasters. The nearest made a grab for her, but she fled the table.

The Prince was given a room and the following day, he was given a fat purse and his supplies were replenished as he continued in his quest. Nothing was said of the sister, and he was too shamed to ask.

It was miles down the road that he saw a figure in a long cloak slip away into the trees and gave chase in the belief that it was the Assassin. But when he had chased the person down, he discovered the woman who he had betrayed with his drunken tongue. He released her, and she attempted once more to escape into the woods.

“Stay and forgive me. I am a stranger here and did not realize the damage my words would cause.” He searched his belt and offered her all his remaining funds. It was not much, even with the purse the King he had given him, but he was used to privation in his long hunt.

“Keep it. Word will spread that I am a witch and none will take jewels or gold from my hand lest it become offal when I have gone.”

“Then… at least allow me to escort you to safety.”

“What of your quest?” That stopped him. He could not then break his vow, though he was responsible for the hardship that had come to the Lady. She shook her head, and offered, “If you will have me as your companion, I will protect you from harm.”

It was on the tip of his tongue to ask her how she might defend him, but he recalled how she had healed her nephew. He consented, though not without misgivings. What kind of warrior hides behind a woman, he thought.

Still, she was useful in more ways than one. That she was a healer he already knew, but she could also tell lies from truth and could charm animals to his bow, though she would only do this when there was no other way to fill their bellies. (! o_O)

It was many years that they spent finding and losing the Assassin and in that time, the pair fell in love. The only thing that barred their marriage was the Prince’s vow. He became paranoid of her safety, even more so when the Assassin took an interest in her and attempted to kill her on more than one occasion.

(Here Liger broke off his story and said:) The Assassin is our most hated enemy, left behind to keep us from recalling our true selves by Merodach. He has had many names and has created many slaves over the years. The Lady was Anunnaki, as the Prince’s Family had been, but the Prince himself was Igigi. He may have stood with us in the war or he may have been an enemy who fell during it. Father was only just beginning then to recover and gather us to him. (This is important later.)

Even an immortal killer can grow tired of being hunted, and the closer the Prince and his Lady came to pinning him down, the more often the Assassin focused his attention on the Lady. Though she did not wish to leave his side, the Prince finally convinced her to stay in a place of his choosing whenever it seemed he might confront the Assassin. On one of these occasions, the Prince lost the Assassin yet again but on returning to the hut where he had left his Lady, he found the place in disarray. She was gone, and it would be many years before he would see her again.

Now the Assassin is a wily creature who wears a mask just as we do, but for other reasons than respect for our Father who was nearly destroyed and still has no face. The Assassin wears a mask foremost to disguise himself from those who might recognize him later and also to disguise the fact that he does not age. Being masked, he has used this tactic many times to hide himself in plain sight, pretending to be one of us. Because we were all once Igigi before this plane was colonized and the Anunnaki rose, it can be difficult for us to tell if an Igigi is friend or foe. This is why Father is so very careful in who he chooses to foster and who he kills.

For several months, the Lady had seen masked figures in the wood and cities they passed, and the Prince saw this as a sign that they were getting closer to the Assassin. In fact, we had noticed the Lady and her great power and were intent upon bringing her to father who was not as mobile then as now. So when the Prince went out to hunt the Assassin, we slipped in and stole her away.

It was many, many years before her memories of her former self surfaced, and she forgave us. (Liger actually said “me,” not “us,” before correcting himself, so this is a true story!!) But she never stopped loving her Prince, which irked her keeper, for he had fallen in love with her himself, and they had been quite close in the age before the Igigi betrayed us. He despised the Prince for the love the Lady felt for him and was determined to make her love him.

So when she begged to be allowed to go to her Prince and tell him the Great Truth, this coward suggested restrictions to test his love. One, she could not under and circumstances remove her mask. Two, she could not speak one word. And three, she must somehow convince the Prince to trust her and come with her. If he had been our ally in the Age of Miracles, then he would not need to see her face or hear her words. He would know her and be drawn to her spirit, accompanying her to Father who would adopt him as his own son.

And the Lady went to her Prince, and he did know her. But he saw the mask and believed she had been stolen away by the Assassin and taught to hate him. He believed she had come to distract him from his vows or to kill him. Had she been able to show her face, he would have seen that she had not aged, though he now had more white hairs than black. Had she been allowed to speak, she might have told him where she had been and why she had been unable to return for so long. He knew none of this and because of his hate for the Assassin, he threatened her and drove her out. For good measure, he said if he ever saw her again, he would kill her.

She returned to us, broken and grieving, a state which pleased her cowardly admirer greatly. He begged her to love him instead her faithless Prince, but all she would say was, “I love you as I love all, but my Prince I love more than all.”

He badgered her day and night, telling her how he loved her and would do anything to prove it. Finally she looked at him, her eyes red after many months of weeping and said, “If you love me, go to him and tell him the truth. I am bound by the restrictions of our Father, but you may speak! If you love me, Brother, tell him we do not belong to the Assassin.”

The coward was infuriated by her words, but he hid it well. She did not know that the restrictions placed on her had been his idea. He refused at first to do as she asked, but each time he begged her to love him, her answer was the same. “I you as I love all, but my Prince I love more than all.”

Finally he agreed to go to the Prince, but as you know, Father does not favor those who find loopholes in his edicts. The Coward went to the Prince, who had grown quite old, and reviled him for turning the Lady away. He told him of the War of Souls and that the Lady was someone of importance and left it at that. It was not the message the Lady or Father would have approved.

When Father learned that the Coward had gone to the Prince and betrayed His existence and the fact that He was gathering His forces, Father was furious. It was much to early for anyone to know His plans, and certainly if the Prince betrayed our secret, the Assassin would learn of it and begin hunting us in earnest. Some thought Father would kill both the Lady and the Coward, but the Lady came forward and offered to take any punishment laid on the Coward for getting round Father’s restrictions onto herself in addition to whatever punishment was laid on her.

Father’s punishment was most cruel. He said that the Lady must kill her Prince.

The Coward was relieved that he would not suffer for his actions, and the Lady’s willingness to suffer in his stead moved him to charity. He could not kill the Prince without earning Father’s wrath, but he would help her get to the Prince who had given up his vows entirely and descended into every debauchery he could find in the few short months since the Coward’s visit. He would help the Lady get close enough to kill her Prince, but not without extracting from her a promise that she would be his if he did so. Even then, he was selfish and unkind in his love.

As always she said, “I you as I love all, but my Prince I love more than all.” But this time, she added, “When the deed is done, you may have whatever is left of me.”

This delighted the Coward who did not think to ask how she planned to kill the Prince or what her words meant. He took her to the brothel where the Prince was pissing away his remaining energies, took the Lady’s mask, and smuggled her inside. It was only later when the Prince and Lady were both found dead of poison that the Coward had cause to regret his actions from beginning to end. Her body was retrieved and revived, but her soul had fled from that life, and her form was nothing more than an empty vessel. The Coward smothered the Revenant and vowed if he ever found the Lady again, he would not try to force her to love him.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

New Recruit

They brought a new recruit in today and I have to help break them. I hate it, even it's necessary. Liger says it's my duty. He'll stand up to just about anyone who tries to bully me, but when it comes to doing my duty I just gotta suck it up and deal. o.O

Not happy about it, but at least it's something I can do that's useful.

It's like this... once upon a time there was a horrible war and everybody on our side, and more than a few on their side, died. All except our Father who *ALMOST* died. He's been working very, VERY hard ever since to restore our memories because when the Igigi defeated us, they stuck us in bodies of their own making and then erased our memories!

And unfortunately the only way to come close to those memories that's been even halfway successful involves mindgames and torture. I'm really very good at the first. It's the second one I really, really hate. I still remember when I first joined the family and the months and months and months of horror and I STILL can't remember who I was. I mean, at least I didn't go crazy like some, but it totally sucks because I want to remember so bad. I know me and Liger must have known each other because Anunnaki and Igigi will kind of know each other on sight, especially if they were close. And I Liger and I must have been very, very close for him to ONLY talk to me.


Liger's giving me a look to stop playing with my blog and go do my job. :( I gotta go.

Bye for now. <3

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

in which I introduce myself and tell you about the Family

Hello everyone! I'm Tigercub :) You can call my Ty or Cubby. This is my blog. I'm going to talk about lots of things you probably don't know about here, but I hope I can make you believe me! It's very important that you do!

<--That's a Liger!

Me and my family move around a LOT. We're always busy. Sometimes my brothers and sisters don't have time for me, and Father is almost always away, but I have Liger to take care of me. So it's not so bad. He's my big brother, and he makes sure no one is mean to me. I have a really big family, and some I've never even met! A lot of times when Father takes us into his family, my new brothers and sisters go mad and then they can be very dangerous and hurt themselves or other Siblings. Some of my Siblings think Liger is mad, but he's not. He just doesn't like to talk to them because they're so selfish and care more about being important to Father than doing their jobs right.

I try to do my job and learn as much about everything as anyone will teach me. Even if I can't remember ANY of my past lives like some of my older Siblings, I can do a lot of things they can't. No one knows who I was, but I've heard them whispering that I must have been a general! o.O I don't know about that! I don't feel important. I just want to learn and do my job well and help Father.

That's why Liger talks to me and no one else. He says I may have forgotten who I am, but not my duty. :D He makes me so happy when he says stuff like that! No one else says nice stuff to me. And a lot of times they're jealous. That makes me sad. I didn't ask to have all this power. I am trying to do what I am supposed to; so when the Igigi come back, we can save humanity. I don't know why the others should be jealous of me for that. We're all trying to do the same thing, right?

Monday, June 20, 2011

in which this poem is not about me

Tyger Tyger, burning bright,
In the forests of the night:
What immortal hand or eye,
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what distant deeps or skies,
Burnt the fire of thine eyes?
On what wings dare he aspire?
What the hand, dare seize the fire?

And what shoulder, & what art,
Could twist the sinews of thy heart?
And when thy heart began to beat,
What dread hand? & what dread feet?

What the hammer? what the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? what dread grasp,
Dare its deadly terrors clasp!

When the stars threw down their spears
And water'd heaven with their tears:
Did he smile his work to see?
Did he who made the Lamb make thee?

Tyger Tyger, burning bright,
In the forests of the night:
What immortal hand or eye,
Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?