Depressed

I've been kind of sad the past few days. First it was Sarah leaving, and obviously she had to go with her parents, but I liked having someone follow me around who wanted my attention. Then the thing with Naomi.

I'm not angry, but Naomi, if you're reading this, I really do believe you've made a mistake. Don't you know, deep down, where you belong? Father is always busy, busy, but he would have killed you by now if you weren't one of us. If we ever met, I would try my best to show you the truth, and I would do everything I could to make sure you weren't punished too severely for betraying us. It was just a mistake on your part. That's all. Considering how much of what we were is kept from us by what the Igigi did, it's not surprising so many Chosen rail against father and try to fight or run.

Come visit me anyway if you can Naomi. I won't be here much longer, but we could talk if you came. Secret-like. No one will know but you and me, and if you don't like what I have to say, you can go away again. I won't try to keep you, even if I want to. There's such comfort in knowing where you belong. I just want to make you understand. You would be happy. We could be sisters.

I know what really scares people, what turns them away from their instincts... the deaths, the murders. There's a reason for it, but I can't talk about it yet. :( Besides, Liger thinks I don't know what kind of work he does for father, but I've read the blogs. I'm grateful for how he takes care of me and protects me, but sometimes I think he tries to shelter me too much. Maybe that's why Inquisitor hates me. He's the only one who doesn't baby me even a little bit. Maybe he resents how sheltered I am. Maybe he's a better friend than I give him credit for and just wants me to live up to my potential.... not that I'm looking forward to working with him again. I hate watching people suffer and not being allowed to stop their pain until he says so.

We leave in less than a week. This time I won't say where we're going aside from further west and south.

Mischief

I swiped some hotdogs from a BBQ some people were having. They never even saw me walk away. People are so blind... I feel sorry for them sometimes, but things will get better for them eventually. So I just have to be patient.

Sarah and I had a picnic inside a pine tree on the soft needles, a cave of bare and green branches around us, hiding us from view. When we saw her brother walking past, we threw pine cones at him, but he never saw us and ran away crying. Sarah had both hands over her mouth to smother her laughter. We went to find find some water to clean the sap off Sarah's clothes and found a beehive. The bees were easy to charm, and I got us both some honeycomb to chew on, which made Sarah stickier, but there was a stream nearby.

Unfortunately when we got to the stream, Sarah fell in and added mud to the sap and honey. There was no cleaning that off, so we went back to the campgrounds where her family was packing up to leave. :( I didn't know they were leaving today. Apparently her brother was looking for her when we beaned him with the pinecones.

I feel bad that I got her in trouble with her parents. Her mother wrestled her bag back out of their car and dragged Sarah into the cabin to wash her off.

But I guess it's better that she goes. She's not one of us and I don't want to see her get hurt because of me.

Camping

The campgrounds are nice. There are cabins and places for tents and RV hookups, which is where we are. Least we're in some "mountains," though they don't seem much like mountains to me after moving around in the Appalachia for so long. I'm glad at least for the trees. I'd heard Oklahoma was all grasslands.

There are some siblings here, but also some humans, which means I can't wear my mask. I feel naked without it. We could take care of them, one way or another, but this is a public place. So chances are, more humans would move in once it looked to the admin as if they'd gone. Just really not worth the effort when we'll be moving on in a few weeks.

I could hollow them. That doesn't really take a lot of skill. But they'd just be a bunch of drooling bodies, sitting around in the Oklahoma heat. I'm not practiced enough to be able to fill them up with something else, and I haven't got permission either. Just because Inquisitor isn't around doesn't mean I can't still get in trouble.

There are some other kids here. The eldest girl is a snob and only talks on her cell phone about how bored she is and how hot it is and how she misses whoever she's talking to soooooooooooooo much. It is to gag. :P I almost want to kill her cell phone battery so she SHUTS UP. But I am being good and not calling attention to us with any "unexplainable phenomena." Her brother likes to poke things with a stick and climb trees and thinks girls are "dumb." So he's pretty boring, too.

Their little sister is nice though. They don't have much use for her, being only ten to their eleven and fourteen. And their parents ignore all three and just sit and drink and fish or play poker with some of the other people in the cabins. They remind me of my parents, never noticing ANYTHING. Sarah, the little one, has been following me around the campgrounds since I'm the only one who pays her any attention. I've been showing her how to weave grass and what plants are good to eat and what animal prints go with which animals... nothing too weird.

I want to ask Liger if I can keep her. :3

But I'm pretty sure he'd say no :(

So I won't ask until right before we're ready to leave here. Otherwise he'd probably make me stop playing with her as soon as I asked, and I hardly ever have anyone close to my own age to play with.