Booooooooooooooooored and creeeeeeeeeeeeeeped out

I cut all my hair off. Half of it was burned away, and I can't make hair grow any faster than normal. So I cut it off. It's just hair, and this is just flesh, and both are just part of a mask that my soul wears.

I don't know what I'm posting about really. I feel... blah. Liger has been nurse-maiding me like crazy, and I haven't been allowed to leave the apartment or go anywhere without him. And I love him, but not that way. It so weird to know he does love me that way. I don't want it. I feel awkward and weird. I'm glad I have this outlet, else we'd have to talk about it or something. Father doesn't bar his children from having relationships, but there's no guarantee that their children would be born Anunnaki. There's all kinds of conditions that control how a soul is reborn and with what souls it grows and I really don't know how it works. And this is a tangent. I just don't want to deal with knowing Liger likes me. Who does he think I was in whatever life we shared? Because I don't feel that way about him. I'll never feel that way about him. I don't want a boyfriend dammit. I want a big brother.

Especially now that... now that Whistler is dead, and I'll never see her again, except in my head if that darkling messes with me again. And I am so angry because I think Inquisitor got her killed catching his brother, the darkling host, and he didn't have any right! Even if he could get the darkling out of his brother's body, his brother is GONE. It's just a body! It's -it's a waste of time and resources. Father would NOT approve. The darkling's killed two chosen while we've kept him here.

I should be sleeping, but this is about the only time I can post without Liger looming in the background. He doesn't show any interest in computers, but that doesn't mean he might not read over my shoulder.

I'm just gah!!!!!!! Arrrrrrrrrg! I hate being cooped up. Now I don't even have any work to do because Liger doesn't trust Inquisitor not to hurt me. Heck I don't even trust him. But I feel like I'm being smothered. I need to do stuff.

In my head

So, um... Inquisitor came back. I woke up with him standing over me, and he definitely wasn't happy. He dragged me out of bed by my hair and wanted to know what I was doing in the basement. I guess the Creeper was telling tales just like I figured he would. Bastard.

"No one knew where you were. I was worried!" I shouted, curling up into a ball as he kicked me. First rule of enduring a beating, preserve your squishy bits.

"You were worried about me?" He sneered at me, like it was the stupidest thing he ever heard. Yeah... I'd have to agree with him there. Won't catch me looking for trouble twice. "Up."

Inquisitor grabbed me by my hair again (I should really keep it short), and I had no choice but to get up or have it ripped out. He didn't let go and proceeded to drag me down to the basement. A few people came out of their apartments to stare, and that only made him angrier. "Find something to do, or I will be back for you when I am done with her."

They didn't need to be told twice.

Creeper was back in his chair when we passed, and it looked like Inquisitor had been busy replacing the lights. If anything, it was brighter down there, each bulb giving off tons of light and heat. They looked like outdoor spotlights rather than regular bulbs. I guess that's where he's been, collecting the bulbs and new sockets and maybe even borrowing the technical knowledge of how to replace the old lights. Inquisitor may not be able to keep a person alive if his tortures go too far, but he's hella-good at getting into people's heads. That's why he has the job he does.

The basement was hot and humid like a swamp. Only the light directly over Creeper was out. He looked absolutely pissed about it. Not even my predicament lightened the scowl on his face. Though I guess after the things Inquisitor said, Creeper was probably more upset about my predicament than I was.

Inquisitor threw me into the chair and tied down my hands and feet so I couldn't struggle, not that I would. I'm not that stupid.

"You went out last night without permission," he said, his back to me as he examined his tools.

"I was with Whistler..."

"Liar! Whistler is dead. A darkling ate her a year ago."

I don't remember exactly what I babbled at that point, but Inquisitor slapped me hard enough to make my ears ring. "But I did see her..."

"You little idiot. You let him get into your head. He could have made you do anything. A few more days, and he would have had you unlocking his cage and helping him slaughter us all." I started to cry, and he slapped me again. "You're weak. Everything about you is weak. You should never have been allowed out of your cage."

And then he started to torture me... really torture me, like he was trying to break me like when I was first brought into the Family. I really tried not to scream. I hate when they scream. I didn't want to be weak like he said. I tried to be strong and not scream. It was Whistler who got to me. I could see her standing in the corner, watching Inquisitor hurt me and I started to cry again, and then Inquisitor got angry and put away the knives. And brought out the acid.

My screaming brought Liger down... sometime later. I don't remember. I don't remember anything after Inquisitor dripped acid on my face. I'm sure I must have kept healing myself; otherwise I'd probably be dead. At least Whistler was gone when I looked around. A darkling ate her. A darkling... probably Creeper. Why else pick her to mimic? But then I could just as easily have filled in the blanks myself, recreating my friend who I missed. Inquisitor is right. I am very stupid and useless.

Liger... hit Inquisitor... just once. He knocked him into the table and knocked a lot of his tools on the floor. He leaned down as Inquisitor scrambled to pick them up, and Inquisitor froze where he crouched. Then Liger unstrapped me and carried me upstairs, past Creeper in his cage. He muttered the whole way up to our apartment, about Inquisitor being jealous and overstepping himself, about him being careless and putting us all in danger out of selfishness and that keeping the darkling prisoner was asking for trouble. And he said other things that I won't repeat because they were kind of embarrassing and... now I feel awkward.

I don't think he would have said any of it if he'd known I was awake.

Fun

Whistler is so much fun. Don't get me wrong. I love Liger, but he's not someone who has "fun." He doesn't play. He teaches me things like how to throw a knife correctly, and where to hit someone if I can't get free of them, and how to make a shiv or take care of my weapons. Maybe he thinks that's fun. I guess it can be. I like learning new things, so yeah, it's... I don't know? Satisfying when I get it right, and he's happy with me?

That's not really "fun" though.

Whistler knows how to have fun. She took me out last night, and we stole fruit from an orchard. We snuck into a movie theater and saw Rise of the Planet of the Apes. She showed me how to mess with streetlights, which is actually a useful skill even if Liger calls everything Whistler shows me a "cheap parlor trick." We sparred a little, and she knocked me on my butt as usual, but she said I'm getting faster even if I don't get enough practice "dancing around a big lumbering ass like Liger." LOL Oh I wish they didn't hate each other so, but at least Whistler's insults are funny.

She got me ice cream, mind-whammying the guy behind the counter into thinking we'd paid when we hadn't.

I did ask Whistler about Darklings. Apparently there's more than one kind, but she didn't go into detail more than to say some of our allies are Darklings. I'm guessing the guy in the cage is NOT a friendly Darkling.

Liger, Whistler, and Me

I'm so glad Whistler is back with us! I missed her a lot. She's like... a hard as nails granny who dresses like a desperado complete with two antique mother-of-pearl-handled six shooters, and her mask is like a mashup of tragedy and comedy, split down the middle. People who see her must think she's on her way to star in a play. She can shoot a hole in a quarter tossed in the air; I have one that I keep in my pocket. She makes her own bullets, rolls her own cigarettes, and plays a mean harmonica. She's the coolest person I know. She used to sing and dance in an old West traveling show and met Annie Oakley once. :3

Whistler doesn't whistle though. She takes her name from her bullets slicing through the air (she says). Someone else told me she used to whistle though. The one she used to whistled tunes for died, and she hasn't found him again. :(

I get the feeling that Liger and Whistler don't really like each other sometimes, and I know she and Inquisitor don't like each other, though I don't think Inquisitor really likes anyone. Whistler was the one who first took care of me when I was newly Chosen. I had to go through the trials same as everyone else. She was the one who recognized my talents were full blown, even if I couldn't remember whoever I'd been. She taught me how to heal myself while I was still caged, among other things, and argued for my release so "my talents wouldn't be ruined." Then Liger happened to see me too and went right to Inquisitor to demand I be released into his custody.

To be honest, I was terrified of Liger at first. You know... after what happened when Father saved me. And having Whistler and Liger fight over me didn't help, but Liger's never ever done anything to make me think he might take advantage of me, and really he's like the big brother I never had. No one messes with Liger. So aside from keeping an eye on me to make sure I don't wander off, everyone mostly ignores me just to stay on his good side. Except for Inquisitor who says everyone must have a job, no exceptions.

Sometimes I wish Whistler and Liger hadn't gotten me out of the cage. I never get to do anything or go anywhere. Some Anunnaki don't trust me because Inquisitor didn't "finish" his work with me... as if I'd ever want to leave the Family. At least people here appreciate what I can do, and with everything I've learned about our history, I really don't think there's any other place I'd rather be. I like to think my tiny contribution will make our victory possible. There would be no ocean without all the drops of water that come together form it, right?

I'm glad Whistler's here. She's the one who usually teaches me new things and tells me about our past. If anyone knows about Darklings, it's her.

Whistler's back

I didn't want to go down in the storage area, but I hadn't seen Inquisitor in days, and no one said he had left. I was worried.

We haven't had any prisoners since that woman died. So I haven't had to go down to feed anyone or empty any buckets. (Well, do you expect them to just go in a corner?) Inquisitor told me to stay away from Creeper (that's what I've decided to call the guy), so I assumed he was feeding him... But then no one had seen Inquisitor since Sunday night, and he doesn't usually just leave without giving orders or putting someone in charge.

I hurried down the hall. More lights have gone out now. Creeper didn't make a move or a sound, but I felt his eyes on me as I passed. Inquisitor's workshop was empty though. I didn't dare turn on the light in case someone saw it peeking out from the cardboard taped over the windows, but there was no one there.

Then I had to go back up the dark hall, past Creeper again.

It was too much to hope that he'd leave me alone.

"Does he talk about me, little morsel?" he asked as soon as I left the room. When I didn't answer, he tried to be all comforting and sweet. He doesn't do it well. Just the sound of his voice made my skin crawl. "Tell me how my brother's been, eh? I have some sweets here, little morsel. Little girls like candies, yes?" He held up some kind of hard candy, the wrapper reflecting the dim light of the nearest lightbulb.

"I am not a little girl," I said and could have kicked myself. Should have just kept my stupid mouth shut, especially with how my voice shook. And I hadn't even passed him yet.

"Nooooooo, course not." He grinned or at least his mouth moved into something resembling a grin. He made the candy disappear down his sleeve like a magician, waving his fingers to show the candy had poofed. I wasn't fooled. I've seen such tricks before. Lots of elders have picked up sleight of hand and other tricks over the years and like to impress the noobs with them. "You don't know who I am at all, do you." He said it sullenly, a statement not a question.

"You're a darkling," I said, almost past him.

"You only know that because Kristoph called me thus," he snarled. Another of the lights went out, this one near the door to the stairs, and I looked away from him to the dead light. There were only three left.

I looked back at him and stumbled away. He'd moved to the door of his cage. I didn't even hear him get up. But that wasn't what made me stumble. It was Inquisitor in the cage. The darkling grinned at me, his teeth filmy with bluish black slime.

"We're twins," he said. "Can't you tell?" Another light went out with a ~*POP*~

I broke and ran for the door, and that's when it opened, and I ran right into someone.

"Oi, poppet. Is that anyway to greet an old friend?" The old woman asked in her vaguely British accent.

And it was Whistler, and I was so glad. She didn't scold me at all or ask questions, and I was too shaken up to ask her the million that crowded my head, like where she'd been for so long and why she was back. Whistler glanced down the dark hall where the darkling chuckled, but she let the door fall shut behind us and guided me back up the stairs without a word.

A caged monster is still dangerous

Another prisoner dead. She was only in our custody for a few hours before she picked the lock of her cage and got out. And then she made the mistake of trying to free the creepy guy, or maybe he lured her somehow, asked her for help. I don't know. But she's dead. We found her crouched in front of his cage. She'd fallen forward in death, but the cage kept her balanced on her knees so she looked like she was praying. She was in worse condition than the kid.

I won't go into details.

I hope Inquisitor gets rid of this guy soon. That's two Chosen who won't be around to help Father when the time comes. That should be more important that whatever relationship Inquisitor had with this... this freak.

Guess who had to get rid of the body again though. :<  She was bigger than the kid. One of the guys helped me get her up to the bathtub I used for the kid, but he didn't stick around to help me... jerkface. Let's just say I've gone through a lot of professional strength liquid plumber lately.

Ughs, I want this guy to go away. He tries to talk to me now when I pass his cage. Just "Hi" and "Watchadoin'" like he's talking to a five year old. I can ignore that, but when he just chuckles at me, that's when the muscles of my neck bunch up. I know what the phrase "hair standing on end" means now.

Creepycreepycreepy go awaygoaway!

Dead

That kid is dead... I came down to feed him, and he was dead. He was sprawled on his side near the chainlink that separated him from creepy-guy, his eyes bulging and his tongue sticking out from his black lips. Suffocation, I'd guess, but how? Creepy-guy hadn't moved so far as I could see, but then I can't see much. The light nearest him is out, and I'm certainly not going to go into his cell to change it. And even if he had moved, how could he strangle the kid? The wire mesh is just tight enough that even if he could squeeze his hands through the holes, the kid would have had to sit there a let the guy choke him. I mean, if the creepy-guy bothered him as much as he bothers me, I can't see him doing anything like that.

I unlocked the cage to get a better look at the kid, trying to avoid looking at creepy-guy. I felt like he was staring at me the whole time and grinning, though he wasn't. I could at least see that much. The kid had burn marks on his throat, and I know he didn't before. Even if we had shocked or burned him in our efforts to make him cast off the memories of his current life, I would have healed him of wounds this severe.

I looked over at the creepy-guy and that's when Inquisitor decided to show up. :<

"What are you doing?" he barked at me, like I'd done something wrong. "Don't touch him." I wasn't really sure if he was talking about the kid or creepy-guy.

"He's... dead." It was kind of a lame statement. I mean, obviously the kid was dead. Any idiot could see that.

Inquisitor looked down at the kid with a shrug. I know whoever the kid was, he'll just be reborn into a new body somewhere down the line, but it's still pretty rude not to even care.

I looked over at creepy-guy again and Inquisitor grabbed me by the chin, digging his fingers in painfully. "Stay away from him," he hissed into my face before shoving me away.

I felt like saying... Dude, no problem, but it's impossible to really have a conversation with Inquisitor, even if you agree with him. The only thing he finds acceptable is silence and quick action. I backed away and edged around him to get out into the hall.

Then I heard the laugh.

It was a deep, gurgling chuckle. I immediately knew it wasn't Inquisitor, and not only because he doesn't laugh, ever.

"What's the matter brother?" said a voice that sounded like he was talking through blood. I looked back, but creepy-guy hadn't so much as twitched. "Is she precious to you?"

"You are no brother of mine," Inquisitor said in disgust as he reached down and grabbed the boy by the arm, dragging the body from the cell. He looked up and saw me still in the hall, and I saw his eyes narrow. uh oh "If you have nowhere to be, I will give you work," he snarled at me, dragging the body another foot before tossing down the arm he held. "Dispose of this and make sure no other prisoners are put in cells adjacent to the Darkling-spawn's."

So I guess there's more about the Darklings than what I'd heard, because I thought they were shapeshifters, not that they went around killing people through wire mesh.